“You can be in charge again”
Feel in control of your thoughts and feelings
Your natural flight or flight reaction has been switched onto a high level and you’re stuck on a roundabout which you’d love to get off.
Do not deny your feelings as it’s natural to feel anxious as you are wired up to keep yourself safe when you are in danger = your natural fight or flight reaction = adrenaline release fired by your Amygdala in your brain – with the resulting physical responses in the body which would keep us safe if we were attacked by a lion. NO LIONS! So we don’t run so we don’t use up the adrenaline so this stress hormone (plus cortisol) builds up in our body so next time we feel stressed this next rush of adrenaline adds to that already there – HEY PRESTO I FEEL LIKE I NEED TO BURST!
You’ve heard all of this before.
What keeps the anxiety running?
Normal thoughts become invasive thoughts due to the adrenaline and cortisol inside you.
What are your intrusive thoughts which are bugging you?
Anger, Ashamed, Guilt, Sadness, Hurt?
Where have those feelings come from?
Your relationships at home?
A situation at work?
Talking helps – to book your FREE 30 minute start off coaching session
Call me to help you break the cycle 07974 400575
Email me fran@coachingforwellbeing.co.uk
Worried about being able to pay? Then I have various options so please don’t let that be the reason you don’t get in touch. I do what I do because it’s what I do best and NOT to make the big bucks!
Read on!
1. Be Really Really honest with yourself about the feeling which is driving you … but then it’s probably not the first feeling which you thought of but some other feeling underneath. For instance a feeling of anger is often in response to a feeling of hurt or deep sadness.
Let the feelings out – “Let the bear roar”. You can do this in a safe place away from everyone. In the car is a good place – but watch the road!
2. Get those thoughts out of your head and start to write how you feel in a journal. Explore themes and new AHA! moments.
3. Create new positive messages for yourself to keep a positive mind-set
4. Meditation, mindfulness and rest will all help your situation.
5. Allow someone you trust to support you and share how you feel. Don’t expect them to solve things – simply listen and be there for you – and give you a hug. Why spend time with people who drain you or criticise you? Keeping time with these people to a minimum – even members of your family – will help you now. Maybe you’re feeling lonely and can’t think of anyone who you can trust?
6. Find the right combination of supplements to counteract the effects on your brain. Your brain will have been on overload for quite a while even before you realised what was going on.
Multivitamins, Magnesium, 5HTP, blend of Aromatherapy essential oils, herbs, ASEA can all help and I explain how using my Biochemistry knowledge.
7. Unwind those sub-conscious reactions. I love showing my clients how they can use EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) at home. This helps to “kick start” the commitment we need to “reclaim” ourselves and the recovery we are searching for.
8. Exercising regularly helps us remove the adrenaline and stress hormone cortisol from the body.
9. Why are you trying to do too much? Who is asking too much of you? Work, family, friends…. You and your own expectations? Whatever our life is like we all need to simply life….or you would not be reading this blog!
There’s lots we can do it’s about finding the commitment and space to start off the process. It’s widely known now that it takes 21 days to create and keep a good habit/routine so it sticks as a part of our life.
As we get insights into where it all came from we are able to take away the power of the anxiety to mess us up.
We are always helped by thinking thoughts full of love and heartfelt appreciation for ourselves.
YES we can all do this – even if, at first we don’t believe it, thinking loving thoughts will short circuit those critical wounding thoughts you are having now.
Find out more about how your emotions get trapped in your system – polyvagal system
- You are What You Think All Day Long ~ so let’s think better thoughts. Stop that barrage of thoughts of doubt, judgement, confusion and worry NOW.Remember – the mind can only think about one thing at a time so let’s make the thoughts positive and caring and shut out the rubbish thoughts.2. CLOSE your eyes now and think of a better picture which your thoughts can create for you NOW.
What words would you choose now? TRUST the positive words.
KEEP SAYING THEM EVEN IF YOU DO NOT THINK THEY ARE TRUE.
I love and accept myself as I am now warts and all
I value myself and am saying ‘Yes’ to me.
I am calm and collected.
I have the time and I’m on time because time is my constant companion.
I am safe, I love myself, I am at peace
3. Go to a lovely place in your mind
Whatever we create or accomplish it was created first in our mind. Whenever there is something you wish to change start the change by trusting your thoughts; they are creating and defining you. When you think positive thoughts you are becoming a more positive person; when you think resourceful thoughts you are becoming a better person.
You have a CHOICE as to what you think about, it’s really as simple as that, but the hard part is breaking the HABIT of those old thoughts ‘whizzing’ around our minds. Simply knowing you can do this when you are ready is reassuring and it’s a way out and forward when the time is right for you.
4. Remember it’s ONLY us who can change our thoughts we are no longer the victim to others or outside circumstances. We BECOME the thoughts we focus on consciously and subconsciously. Let’s keep the thoughts positive even when we are feeling negative ~ and maybe even don’t even know where the thoughts are coming from. Do you need to let out the feelings which are driving the thoughts? Allow yourself to weep a few tears.
5. Yes, OK, I know that those rubbish thoughts will invade again and again;
simply bring yourself back time and again to the positive thoughts treat yourself the way you would treat a puppy dog ~ ” come back, come back I know things seem more fun over there but come back to me”.
6. This is a new way of being and you can TRUST that, in the same way as muscles get stronger as you use them, your mind will become more able to stay more positive as you keep the positive words there in the mind. Whatever it is you are thinking about you can shut it out ~ until you can actually do something about the situation or say the things you want to say to the person ~ or you are able to write something down which you wish to remember.
Until then the thoughts are completely ineffective and maybe even self-destructive.
7. Becoming more mindful of the things around you helps by simply looking at the furniture, the buildings around you if you are walking, the colour of the things around you. These things are solid and real and really seeing them will shut out the thoughts.
8. Imagine and clearly define your best new life/situation and you will start to make different choices in life aligned with your new picture. Don’t worry about how this will happen; simply start to take baby steps in that direction and you are doing something positive about where you are NOW.
NOW is all that we are able to change. The past is finished and the future is yet to come.
9. All you can change is NOW in the moment ~ so why not make every thought positive and caring for you. This really does work and there is enough information out there which confirms this.
10. Talking to someone helps us to crystallise our thoughts and what is really important to us. If you don’t know anyone who you feel is able to help maybe I can offer my services to you.
Hello I’m Fran Doidge
Call me now on 07974 400575 and we can arrange a FREE 30 minute chat by phone, Zoom/Skype or email fran@coachingforwellbeing.co.uk
My unique strength is the combination of Wellbeing Coaching with Relaxing Self-Massage using a luxurious Aromatherapy blend of essential oils.
When feelings are running high the sense of touch along with Coaching helps you keep things in perspective and bring you back to a more calm and balanced place. I have 27 years experience of helping clients gain a fresh perspective on life and a more positive picture of themselves. I’ll help YOU find ways to be true to yourself and others.
Coaching, Mindfulness, Massage ….. and even luxurious Aromatherapy blends especially for you.
- Decide which combination works for you;
- Coaching on it’s own – with Mindfulness where relevant
- Coaching and Massage (Why not talk on Zoom/Skype and I’ll send you Self Massage instructions to enjoy Massage at home)
- Coaching and Aromatherapy (Your luxurious blend of essential oils selected according to your individual needs sent to your home to use in a diffuser or add to carrier oil for self-massage.Your special bit of luxury)
Or a combination of everything.
Let me talk to you in person on my home page video http://bit.ly/2jhuxNe about how I help people who are struggling in their relationship with themselves or at home or with a work colleague ~ BECAUSE the most important relationship is with yourself.
If you’d like to see how I’ve helped others then see my home page at www.coachingforwellbeing.co.uk where you’ll see a lovely box of testimonials on the lower left of the page.
It would be great to connect with you on Facebook, so please come and join my group
Bye for now. x
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